Title:  The Theory of Reverse Darwinism (Part Two)
Author: elfin
Email: elfin@burble.com
Homepage: http://www.sundive.co.uk/
Rating: NC-17
Fandom: Jurassic Park III (AU)
Pairing: Alan/Billy
Archive: A&B List, Britslash only.  Others with permission
Spoilers:  errr... none, really
Summary:  Two years on, Paul Kirby makes Alan an offer he can't refuse

LOADS of thanks to Tomy for looooong beta read - she's wonderful  :-)

Disclaimer: characters are beloved creations of and copyright Michael
Crichton and Peter Buchanan.  I'm just playing with them.



The Theory of Reverse Darwinism Pt 2

by elfin


Two Years Later

With one arm wrapped easily around Billy’s waist, Alan watched the rapid prototyper scope out the resonating chamber of a Velociraptor.

“I am very impressed, Billy,” Alan murmured into his lover’s neck.  He’d been away on a lecturing tour for four weeks, and had missed Billy more than he would ever have believed possible.

The money for the dig was running out.

Since Ian’s visit to Isla Sorna and InGen’s farce in San Diego, the public – and more importantly, the rich, private investors- were now all very aware of the live dinosaurs on both islands.

Alan had given fifteen lectures on his tour, and had succeeded in raising nothing.  They had three weeks of funding remaining.  After that, they would have to pack up and move out.

Billy knew the prospect was breaking Alan’s heart.  He wished there was something he could do, but he was only a graduate student, still didn’t have his doctorate.  What the hell could he do?

But Alan was at least happy to be home.

As fascinated and excited as he was by Billy’s findings, he really needed to be somewhere else with his young lover right now, somewhere private.  Preferably with a bed, but it wasn’t absolutely necessary.

Billy was resisting Alan’s overtly public caresses with some difficulty.  Their relationship hadn’t exactly been secretive, but Alan had very rarely come on this strong when they weren’t alone.

“Did you see Ellie?”

“Yes.”  Alan twisted the fingers of his left hand through the short curls at the top of Billy’s spine, keeping his other arm wrapped firmly around his lover.  “She asked about you.”

Billy smiled.  “What did you tell her?”

“That you were a lusty sex god and I loved you very, very much.”

Pulling down the neck of Billy’s t-shirt, Alan bit gently into the skin just above his top vertebrae, where he knew Billy loved to be kissed and nipped.  He was rewarded with a small shudder and an almost inaudible catch in Billy’s breath.

“Jeez, Alan, you’ve come back as horny as hell.”  There was a definite tease in the soft voice.  “I thought I’d taught you the valuable art of masturbation for these trips.”

“It’s not the same without you watching,” Alan retorted.

At the computer, Chris – a friend of Billy’s - was smirking to himself.

A short bleep signalled the end of the scoping.  “It’s done.”  Billy leaned forward and lifted the lid, reaching in, he carefully snapped off the model and lifted it out of the machine.

Alan sighed softly as Billy’s tight, firm ass rubbed inadvertently against his semi-hard cock.

As Billy straightened, he smiled to himself.  Turning so that he could tease Alan he lifted the end of the resonating chamber to his lips.  Lowering his long lashes, Billy blew delicately into the model.

Even as Alan’s libido reacted to the expression on his lover’s face, his memory reacted to the sound the chamber made.  Velociraptors made that sound.  Live Velociraptors, that had tried to eat him on more than one occasion.

He shivered slightly.  “You are brilliant,” he murmured, taking the model when Billy offered it to him.  He turned it in his hands, examining it.  Then he met Billy’s eyes and smiled.

He was considering everything he was going to do to his lover in wonderful, mental detail, when someone called his name.

Frustrated, Alan turned.  A skinny man was standing just outside the tent.  “Dr Grant?  Paul Kirby, Kirby Enterprises.”


Leaving the bar, Alan drove the open-top jeep out of town toward the dig site.

Instead of leaving the main, dusty highway at the first turning he continued, taking he and Billy to the second site, about two miles from the main camp.

Billy didn’t question it, just let Alan drive.  It didn’t matter, wherever they ended up.

Finally, the jeep came to a stop in a small clearing that overlooked this area of the dig.  Killing the engine, Alan leaned forward, arms around the wide steering wheel.

For a long time, they just sat together, side by side, Billy gazing out across their site.

“We could do with the money,” Billy spoke quietly.

“I know.”

“You took more of a risk rescuing me, and you weren’t even being paid.”

Alan smiled, closing his eyes.  “Hammond showed us a photo of you,” he murmured, so softly that Billy could barely hear him.  “You….  I couldn’t leave you out there and live with myself.”

Billy hesitated, not for a moment did he want to lay a guilt trip like this one on Alan’s shoulders.  He had no right after what the man had done for him.

Alan looked at his lover for a long time before turning away, staring out of the driver’s side window.  “You think I should go.”

Billy shook his head.  “I don’t want you to go,” he said quietly.  “I love you, Alan.  If there’s even the remotest chance that I could lose you… it’s not something I want to think about.”

Alan leaned back in his seat and looked up at the stars above them.  “I love you too, Billy.”  He sighed softly.  “Ian said something to me, as we were taking off from Nublar that second time, with you.  He said, ‘I’m a mathematician, Alan, not a hero.’  When Kirby was talking to us, I was thinking the same thing – ‘I’m a palaeontologist, not a tour guide.’  But that’s all I’d be doing, pointing out dinosaurs from the air.”

Billy took a deep breath.  “I’m not so sure.”

Frowning, Alan shooed Billy out of his seat, out of the jeep so that Alan could take his place in the passenger side.  Billy opened the door and stepped out onto the sill while his lover moved over.  He waited until Alan had moved the seat back as far as it would go, and then hopped back inside, straddling Alan’s lap, his knees on the seat either side of the other’s thighs.

This was one of the reasons they’d bought an open-top jeep.

Wrapping his arms around the other’s waist, drawing him as close as they could get in this position, Alan tipped his head back and Billy covered his lover’s mouth with his own.

Billy loved it when they did this.  It was a nice change to be above Alan, for the older man to have to look up to him.

Breaking the kiss, Alan took advantage of his access to Billy’s throat.  “What’s up?  You don’t think he’s telling us the truth?”

“I don’t know.  She just seemed… desperate, somehow.  Like it was vital to have you along.”  He started to undo the buttons of Alan’s shirt.  “I might be wrong.  I probably am.  We do need the cash, and you’ve always said that you wished I could see the beauty of the island, rather than the brutality.”

Alan stared at him.  “Oh, no.”  He shook his head.  “You’re staying here.”

Billy’s brow wrinkled.  “Why?”

“Why?!  Because….”  He hesitated.  “Billy… you’re the best thing to ever happen to me.  I won’t put you in any danger, no matter how small the risk.”

“And what about you?  I’m supposed to wait here and worry about you!  No way, Alan.”  He pushed his fingers into the thinning hair at the sides of Alan’s head.  “I’m coming with you.  Tonight, and tomorrow.”

Alan looked up into the mischievous eyes glinting in the moonlight.  “You’re making some presumptions,” he teased.

Billy grinned, leaning down to tongue Alan’s lips, teasing him.  “I am?”  He moved his hand down to Alan’s chest, touching his skin, drifting fingers over the hardening nipples.  “Am I not coming tonight?” he asked in his best ‘pained’ voice.

Alan melted.

In the two years they’d been together, he’d hardly ever been able to say no to Billy.  That such a beautiful, sexual young man could find him attractive had always been a mystery to him.  That it could have lasted this long and just become stronger and more intense as time had gone by, utterly bemused him.

Billy’s fingers were unfastening his fly, freeing him from his jeans.

“We should go tomorrow,” that soft voice murmured in Alan’s ear, turning him on with every word.  “It’ll be easy.”  Billy stroked Alan’s cock, hardening it further.  “And we get the cash to fund the dig at least another year.”

Pushing Billy’s denim jacket off his shoulders and down his arms, Alan’s eyes raked over Billy’s face, over the t-shirt pulled tight across his shoulders and chest.  Then, shamelessly, he dropped his gaze to see the erection straining in Billy’s khakis.

“Have I told you how gorgeous you are?  How much I just want to eat you?”

Billy laughed, claiming Alan’s mouth for another kiss.  “You’ve told me,” he murmured against Alan’s lips, “so many times.”

Lifting Billy’s t-shirt from his pants, Alan unfastened his lover’s button fly and dug his hand into his underwear.  “Want me to stop telling you?” he asked, nuzzling against his neck.

“No way.”  Billy lifted his leg back over Alan, somehow getting his trousers and briefs off in the cramped space.

Alan pushed his jeans down over his knees, sitting forward in the seat.  “I’m getting too old for this, Billy,” he muttered as his athletic lover came back into his lap.  Reaching back, Billy opened the glove compartment and grabbed the small tube of lube they kept there.

“That’s crap,” was Billy’s graceful reply.

He coated Alan’s long cock and shifted around until he got into a position that allowed them to do this.  Despite being achingly aroused, Alan couldn’t help but be amused by Billy’s movements.

“Maybe we should try this in the back….  Oh god….”

Finally, Billy had leaned back against the dash and lifted his knees against the back of the seat, directing Alan’s cock deep inside him.

It was difficult to find a rhythm.  They moved together, Alan’s arms holding onto Billy’s.  He loved to watch the expressive face, the long lashes closing over dark eyes, parted lips moving in silent pleasure.

Alan clasped his lover’s thick cock, massaging him, touching him just as he knew he loved to be touched.  He couldn’t get at all the bits he loved to pay attention to as he fucked Billy, so he made do with the parts he could reach.

Leaning forward, Alan sealed his lips over one nipple, suckling firmly, nipping gently and biting quickly before soothing the bud with his tongue.

Billy groaned, scraping his short fingernails over Alan’s chest, gripping his shoulder as he rode him.

The sweet torture of his nipples, and expert hand on his cock brought Billy to a long, shuddering orgasm.  His clenching ass muscles gripped Alan tightly, sparking his own climax.

“We always make such a mess,” Billy murmured, his forehead rested against Alan’s, damp with sweat.

“It’s a good mess,” Alan retorted, hands stroking his lover’s back.

They sat for a few minutes before Billy carefully opened the jeep’s door and clambered down from the vehicle.  Pulling his pants back on, he waited until Alan had moved back into the driver’s seat before settling up again next to him.


Alan sighed.  It had been a very nice interlude, but Kirby’s offer remained there before him.

“As long as you stay behind.”

Billy shook his head.  “Not a chance, Alan.”  He moved, curling up in his seat to face his lover.  “You couldn’t stay if I was going, could you?”  The older man pursed his lips, but he knew he couldn’t.  “Don’t ask me to stay here without you.”

They arrived back at the campsite before Alan finally relented.  “Okay.  We’ll take his money and do this.”

Suddenly he had an arm full of Billy.  Again.  For a muscular, adult male, he could wriggle into Alan’s embrace sometimes like an excited kid.

“Thank you, Uncle Alan!” he cried, arms going around Alan’s neck.  He stayed there for a second but had to move.  “The gear shift’s in my…” he moved back into his seat, “that’s better.”

Alan shook his head.  “I really hope we don’t regret this.”

Opening the door of the jeep, Billy stood up on the sill and looked across to the array of tents and lights.  From here, they could hear the sounds from the team relaxing.  “We can’t regret it,” he murmured.  “We’ve got nothing to lose.”

* * *

Within five minutes of reaching Isla Sorna, Billy knew he’d been wrong.

They had their lives to lose.

He stared at Cooper as Alan’s unconscious form hit the deck of the plane.  Already on his feet, he bunched his fist and was about to start a fight when the plane dipped and the landing gear hit the uneven ground.

Cooper had the hatch open and was out of the plane before it had really stopped.

The Kirbys stepped over Alan’s prone form to get out.  The other two – Udesky and Nash – made their way to the storage hold at the back and started to unload what looked like artillery and other powerful weapons.

Uncertain now, Billy crouched by Alan’s side, putting his hand under his lover’s head, calling his name insistently.

He was more than relieved to see Alan open his eyes.

“What the fuck is going on?”  Alan sat up gingerly, rubbing the back of his head where he’d hit the floor.

“I think they’re looking for someone.”

“Oh, God, Billy… what the hell have we done?”

As Alan got to his feet, hand clasped in Billy’s, the others – the pilot, co-pilot and the Kirbys – came running back onto the plane, shouting about taking off.

Alan glanced at Billy.  Finally, they’d seen sense.

But as the Lear Jet trundled along the overgrown runway, Alan realised that it wasn’t sense that had scared them into retreat.  It was the fucking huge dinosaur that bit Cooper in half right in front of the plane.

Everything happened so fast.

The plane crash was horrific.  They were thrown around like stuffed toys; flesh bruising, bones cracking.  But when they finally came to a jolting stop, by some miracle, they all seemed mostly unscathed.  Alan went for the hatch, pausing at Billy’s shoulder.

“You okay?”

Billy nodded.  “Yeah.  I… think.”

Smiling for a moment, Alan combed his fingers through the short curls at the side of his lover’s head; a tender gesture of love.  Then he was making his way back, and Billy was following him.

Alan forced the hatch open as far as their position would allow, then closed it again.  Turning, he locked his gaze with Billy’s.  “We haven’t landed yet.”

When the Spinosaurus attacked, Billy had a momentary flashback of Clare being taken from them, snapped almost in half, hooked on the teeth in the gaping mouth.

For a single moment he couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe.  He rolled with the remains of the plane, trying hard to get a grasp on his senses as he tried to get a grasp of something more real.

He was terrified.  This wasn’t happening, it wasn’t happening….

And then someone took his hand and held it tight, and he looked up into Alan’s wide, blue eyes.  In the next instant, just before the plane rolled again, he was gathered up against Alan’s body, held secure in his lover’s arms.

Their bodies fitted together perfectly.  They’d spent enough of their spare time rolling around on hard ground to know how to cushion one another.

Billy didn’t look away from Alan’s gaze until the dinosaur’s snout drove through the twisted metal of the plane.  And then they were apart, out and running.

Straight into the path of the T-Rex.

For some reason Billy didn’t quite understand, the fight between the two giants calmed his nerves.  To see them tear into one another made him feel almost insignificant.

It also allowed them to make their escape, for now.

Alan’s outburst had been building since Cooper had hit him on the plane.  Billy just stood by, let his lover express his anger.  This idiot had placed them both in mortal danger.  The chances of them getting off the island alive were indeed very slim.  He didn’t want to die here.  He didn’t want to lose Alan to these monsters.

But the façade of calm held, and only his stone-cold eyes would have given away his inner feelings, if the Kirbys had known him well enough to read the expression.

When Alan told him that they’d return to the plane to salvage whatever hadn’t been damaged, Billy just nodded.  He wasn’t thinking straight, and Alan – thank god – was.

On the other side of the fuselage to where the Kirbys were getting changed, Alan watched Billy as he  crouched down to check the state of his camera.

They shouldn’t have come.  All the wealth in the world wasn’t worth this.  From this small distance, he looked over his lover’s visible injuries.  He had grazes over his right eye, one on his right cheek.  There was a deep slash high on his left arm, about two inches long, just below where the sleeve of his shirt was rolled up over his muscles.  It was bleeding a little.

But there was nothing fatal, nothing that wouldn’t heal to leave a lot less of a reminder than the one he still had from Isla Nublar.

Alan waited until all the pieces were safely stowed away once more in the scruffy bag, and Billy was on his feet, before asking if he was okay.

Billy nodded silently.  But a couple of seconds later, he dropped his bag – still complete with lucky strap - and went gratefully into Alan’s open arms.

“I’m really scared,” he admitted, a whisper into Alan’s ear that no one else heard.

Holding his young lover close, Alan rested his cheek on the damp curls on Billy’s head.  “I know.  Me too.  But we’re going to be all right.”

Billy released a deep breath.  “You told them….”

Alan interrupted him, nodding, stroking his hand over Billy’s shoulder and down his back.  “Just trying to scare some sense into them,” he murmured.  “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

Billy pulled back at those words, levelling his big brown eyes at the wary blue gaze watching him.

“You can’t be responsible for me.  I can look after myself.”


“No, just listen.  You were right.  We’re on this island with no obvious way off it.  If anything happens….  It won’t be your fault.”  He looked down, and Alan bent his neck to rest his forehead against Billy’s.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Alan.  No matter what happens, you have to remember that.”

“I will.  And you have to, too.”

Billy smiled, lifting his head again.  “It’s not something I am ever going to forget.”

“Good.”  His hand cradling Billy’s face, Alan touched his lips to the other’s.  Billy didn’t need any further persuasion.  He opened his mouth under Alan’s, drawing his lover’s tongue over his own.

It wasn’t until they broke apart that they realised they had an audience.  With a faint smile, Billy stepped back.  Alan just looked at them with barely disguised bitterness.

“Alan and I….”  Billy began.

But Paul waved him quiet.  “We… kinda worked that out that night in the bar in Montana,” he explained.

Billy smiled, nodded.  “Right.”  Over Amanda’s shoulder, Udesky was staring at them, mouth hanging open.  But he couldn’t have cared less.  “We should get going,” he said, more to Alan than to the others.  “Are you three ready?”

“Just let me grab my backpack,” Paul requested, turning from them and disappearing for a moment back behind what was left of the plane.

Side by side, Billy and Alan stood and watched Kirby fail to swing the pack onto his shoulders.  When Billy asked him about K2, Alan had to walk away.

He knew then.  They’d been lied to, not just about the reason for the trip, and the itinerary, but about there being a Kirby Enterprises.  There was no money.  The cheque they’d been handed was useless.

They were out here, and even if they made if home alive, the dig still didn’t have enough funding to carry on for any longer than three more weeks.

Paul Kirby had put him, and more importantly, Billy, in the most dangerous place in the world.  If the dinosaurs didn’t kill him, Alan just might.

As they started away from the crash site, Udesky fell into step beside Billy.

“So,” he started casually, “you and Dr Grant are….”

Billy nodded.  “Uhhu.”

“Right.”  He shook his head, shrugging.  “Never can tell about people, can you?”


They walked for about a mile before they found any signs of Eric and Amanda’s ‘friend’, Ben.

The parasail snagged in the tree, the life jacket, the abandoned video camera and finally the half-eaten, decomposed body of an adult male, all served to only convince Alan that the two were dead.

Conversely, they seemed to give the Kirbys hope that Eric, at least, had survived their arrival and had taken refuge somewhere close by.

Alan, as angry as he felt, didn’t feel the need to take that hope from them right now.

Amanda found the ‘raptor nests accidentally.  Having the rotting corpse of her boyfriend falling on to her had pushed her over the edge, and she’d run.

Paul stopped her, tried his best to comfort her.

And then they saw what they standing next to and called Dr Grant over.

Of course Alan had known that the dinosaurs were breeding on the island.  Ian had told him that after he’d got back.  But to see it for himself, the extent of it, terrified him.  And to be standing in the centre of a huge raptor nest, waiting for mommy and daddy to return, wasn’t his idea of a safe place to be.

As Alan led the group away, heading back passed where they’d found Ben’s remains and the parasail that Billy had picked up, he glanced back, searching out his lover.

“Where’s Billy?”

Paul, Amanda and Udesky glanced at him as they walked passed.  Billy wasn’t at the back of the group.

Heart pounding in his chest, Alan back-traced their steps.  He almost ran into Billy at the edge of the nest.

“Don’t ever do that to me again!”

Billy smiled, but the expression on Alan’s face, the worry in his eyes and the breathless quality of his voice wiped it away.

“I’m okay, Alan.  Don’t worry.”

“Billy….”  Dropping a quick but hard kiss to his young lover’s mouth, Alan started back to join the rest of them again, this time making sure Billy was following.  “If I lose you, it’s just me and the damn tourists.”

Reaching out, Billy stroked the back of Alan’s neck with his fingertips.  “You’re not going to lose me.”

* * *

They ran.

Billy wasn’t sure how long his heart could keep beating like this before it exploded.

The ‘raptor in the compound had come after him, he knew.  It had selected he and Amanda rather than Paul, Alan and Udesky.  It had selected them because he’d stolen two ‘raptor eggs.

And now they were running with a herd of Hadrosaurs.  Running for their lives because of him.

His concentration was shot to hell.  He tripped and fell.  The strap on his camera bag slipped from his shoulder and fell to the grass.  He only noticed it when he clambered back to his feet and started to run again.

Good riddance, he thought to himself, hearing Alan instruct them that they should head into the trees.

And then Alan vanished from sight.


Breaking the rules, Billy pulled himself up onto a thick branch and called out Alan’s name, listening intently for any reply.

Sitting in another tree, a couple of hundred yards away, Paul leaned forward to ask their guide if what he was doing was such a great idea.  Catching his arm, Amanda pulled him back and shook her head.

“Don’t,” she murmured.

Paul hesitated, but he nodded, understanding.

“Alan!”  Billy’s voice almost cracked on the single word, emotion filling his tone.  “Alan!”

There was nothing.

The sun had set, leaving them with the eerie shadows created by the bright light of the moon, and the darkness between the trees.


He knew he shouldn’t be calling out.  He could attract the wrong kind of attention.

But he couldn’t bear the thought of Alan out there, alone.  He had more experience, of these islands and these creatures, than any of them.  But that didn’t mean he could survive a ‘raptor attack.  They’d been surrounded as they’d run into the trees, and Billy knew why.  Despite the loss of his camera, and all the photographs he’d taken, he could only be thankful that his bag’s other contents were gone.

It had been a mistake to steal the ‘raptor eggs from the nest, he knew that now.  He’d thought that perhaps they would be worth something, perhaps enough somethings to fund the dig – their dig – for a long time to come.

But so what?  What if they had?  Who would he trust enough to sell them to?  When the first person died on the mainland, the blood would have been on his hands.

He was well rid of them.

So why had the ‘raptors still chased them, ignored the herd and followed them into the woodland?

Miserably, Billy lowered himself into the curve of the thick tree branch.  He could see Paul and Amanda not far away, talking quietly.  He dared not think about Alan’s fate.

There was a good chance, of course, that he was also sitting high up in a tree, too far from them to hear Billy’s calls, or unable to answer because of the inherent danger.  Alan could be hearing the call and cursing Billy for being so stupid.  It was a cussing the young man would be more than happy to hear for himself if it meant his lover was alive.

The other alternative was unthinkable.

Billy closed his eyes against the moonlight dripping through the leaves of the trees.  He didn’t want to think about now, so he let his mind drift, let his thoughts pick a memory to make him smile.

Out of all the times he and Alan had made love, his mind chose to recall the first time he’d topped.

He’d had a couple of relationships before with other men.  Nothing even close to the one he had with Alan, but a couple of long-term boyfriends.  He’d always been a top.  His partners had loved him to dominate them.  Danny – his first serious boyfriend - had once told him that he had a gentle dominance that was both seductive and addictive.

But when he’d met Alan, he’d found himself with a need to turn the tables.  He’d wanted to be topped, wanted the older man to claim him in every possible way.  There was no sensation he craved more than having Alan sheathed to the hilt inside him.

Six months after they’d first slept together, they’d found themselves at a conference in Oklahoma.   All expenses paid by the organisers, they’d opened the door to their room when they’d arrived and laughed like kids at the size of the bed.

After sharing an air mattress for six months, the kingsize bed was more than a luxury.  They stripped one another naked, taking time to explore, making use of the room they had.

Alan sat up on the bed, legs tucked under him, teasing light fingertips over Billy’s wonderfully tanned body, tracing the lines where his shorts had blocked the sun and his skin was pale.

“What do you want?” Alan asked quietly.  Billy’s expression made him chuckle.  “I know.  You want pleasure.  My hands all over you, touching you, caressing and stroking you.”  Alan’s voice alone was stroking Billy to a rock-hard erection.  The callused fingers over his nipples were building a fire in his groin.

“What else do you want?  Really… want?”

Billy reached out, touching his hand to Alan’s smooth chest.  “I want to be inside you,” he murmured, eyes darkened with pleasure.

Alan smiled, as if he’d known.  “I’ve… never done this before,” he admitted to Billy’s incredulous expression.


“Never.”  Billy already knew Alan’s bi-sexual history.  “I’ve always been….”

“A top.”  Alan nodded.  “Are you sure you want this?”

“Oh, yes.”

Pressing Alan down onto his back, Billy took his time preparing his lover.  Kissing him deeply, he spent almost an hour working his way down the body he worshipped.  Nipping, licking, nuzzling and teasing every inch of Alan’s flesh, he made certain that Alan would be begging for him.

Grabbing the lube from the floor, Billy coated his fingers and leaned over his lover, holding himself up on one arm, stroking back and forth over Alan’s anus.

“Billy… fuck!”

“Patience….”  He teased in return.  But he gave Alan one slick finger.  This was nothing they hadn’t done before.

Leaning down, he kissed Alan deeply, almost forcing his tongue inside the other’s mouth as he added another finger to the first.

Alan thrust up and dropped back, clenching his muscles, squeezing Billy’s fingers.  Billy’s long-ignored erection jumped, aching now.

“Alan….  I have to….”

“God, yes!”  His whole body was screaming ‘it’s about time!’  “Please, Billy!”

With Billy, he’d tried every position they could think up.  But Alan wanted to watch his lover’s angelic face while they did this.  He wanted to see the pleasure there that he knew and understood so intimately.

As Billy sat back, coating his cock with the lube, concentrating on not coming the moment he touched himself, Alan lifted his legs.  And as Billy moved into position, Alan rested his thighs and shins against the muscular torso, linking his ankles behind the dark blond head.  He was more than prepared, more than ready for Billy to push his thick cock against the relaxed ring and slowly move deep into Alan’s body.

All the way in, Billy paused, breathing coming in rapid gasps, wanting more than anything to pound into the tight ass until he exploded.  He forced himself to still, to commit to memory how Alan looked at that moment.

Sitting cradled in the branches of the tree, the chill of the night air settling around him, Billy called on the memory in detail to get him through the long, dark hours, unsure of his lover’s fate.


Alan watched, impressed, as Eric made himself comfortable in amongst the wreckage of the inside of the water truck.

They’d eaten and chatted.  As the sun had set the Compys had vanished and they’d opened the hatch again to let in the cooling air.

Now, as Alan pulled it closed for the night, Eric watched him in the amber glow of the lantern.

“My parents… they’re on their own out there, aren’t they?” he asked quietly, as if he really didn’t want to hear the answer.  He didn’t have too much faith in them being able to survive on the island, especially together.

But Alan shook his head.  “They’re with an expert.”  He smiled to himself.  ‘At least, they were when I left them.’

“I thought you were the expert,” Eric commented, surprised.  “Who else is here?  Dr Malcolm?”

Alan chuckled.  The thought of Ian returning to the island after the last time made him smile.  The San Diego incident had given Alan enough piss-taking material to last a lifetime.

“No.  His name’s Billy Brennan.  He’s….”

“Your boyfriend.”  A smile had lit Eric’s face.

Alan stared at him, a smirk curling his lips.  “I was going to say, research assistant.”

“Oh.”  Eric at least had the decency to look embarrassed.

Alan watched him for a moment.  “What makes you think he’s my… boyfriend?”

“You presented a lecture together in Oklahoma.  I went with my school.  The way you two were, together, on stage….  Everyone was talking about it on the bus home, especially the girls.”

Alan laughed.  He remembered the conference, but not because of their public performance.  “I guess we’ll have to be more careful,” he stated.  They’d never even attempted to hide their relationship; had never wanted to nor felt the need to.

“Then it’s true?” Billy asked him cautiously.  “You and he….”

Alan hesitated, but he nodded in the end.  “It’s true.”  After a moment of watching Eric’s smiling face, he asked, “Does it make a difference?  I mean….”  He wasn’t sure he could put his meaning into words.

But Eric was shaking his head.  “You mean, the way I feel?  About… liking you, and your books and your work?”  Alan nodded.  Why did kids always come straight to the point when adults couldn’t?  “No, it doesn’t make any difference.”

“Good.”  He wasn’t sure why, but it was good to know that.

It was difficult to sleep in the cramped space, and Alan found himself thinking of the first night they were at that conference.  Heart aching, he could only hope and pray that Billy was safe.


They started out at about the same time the following morning, although neither party knew it.

Billy led Amanda and Paul, continuing their way out toward the coast.  At least, that’s the way Billy hoped they were going.  Following the stream was his only way of really being sure they would find the ocean at some point.  How far from the water they were, he honestly didn’t know.

Alan and Eric also followed the stream, looking and listening out both for impending danger, and for any audible signs of the others.

An hour later, Eric heard it.

Billy followed the Kirbys as they ran.  They’d found Eric, it seemed.  He was glad for them, relieved that at least they didn’t have to worry about running across their son’s half-eaten corpse.

He looked up as they closed in on the fence.  A young boy was running across the open grass toward them.  In the next moment, another figure broke through the trees and came running after him.


“Alan!”  Billy beat the Kirbys to the fence, climbing between the thick, wide metal bars, reaching through the blue rope grid.

Alan looked up when he heard his name cried out in an emotion-filled voice.

“Billy….”  He breathed his lover’s name, a smile lighting his face.

The family momentarily forgotten, Alan and Billy reached for one another through the barrier.

“Alan… god… I thought you were dead.”  Billy wound his slim arms around his lover’s neck, getting as close as he could with the rope between them.

Alan put one arm through a lower section, curling it around Billy’s waist, his other hand twisting into Billy’s soft blond curls.

Their mouths met in an open kiss, tongues stroking over one another’s; tasting, reassuring one another that they were alive and together again.

Only when they parted, fingers still clutching one another, did Billy see the bag over Alan’s shoulder.  His face paled.  “Alan….”

But his lover was turning from him, the smile already fading from his face.  Two hundred yards in front of them, on Alan’s side of the fence, the Spinosaurus was standing, just watching them, as if waiting for them to run.  Challenging them.

Eric and Alan took off, the others racing along the other side of the fence.  In a couple of strides, the dinosaur was closing in behind them.

This was real.

One snap of its mighty jaw and the animal could bite Alan or Eric in half.  It would be a violent, agonizing, terrifying death.

The hole in the fence was pure luck.  Eric leapt through, not breaking his run as he went.  A second later, Alan bolted through after him.  He almost landed on top of Billy when he jumped.

The young man’s arms reached for him almost without him thinking about it.

They didn’t stop until it became obvious that their persuer couldn’t – for the moment – make it through behind them.

Pausing for breath, Eric found himself gathered into a tight hug by both his parents.

Billy found himself being pulled against Alan’s body, held so tightly in his lover’s arms he had no choice but to return the embrace.

“Billy….  Billy….”

A second later there was a massive crash and they were running again.

Ensuring the bolt held, Alan and Billy left the Kirbys to their hugging and wondered further into whatever this strange building was.


Glancing around, Alan smiled warmly at Billy and reached back to wrap one arm around his young lover’s waist.

“Are you okay?” he asked, concerned.

Billy sighed softly, sadly, shaking his head.  “The bag, Alan... there are two ‘raptor eggs in there.”

Billy watched as his lover’s face fell, relief and love replaced by disappointment.  The worst emotion to have replaced the adoration he basked in seeing there.  His heart sank.

“‘Raptor eggs?”  The arm dropped from around his waist, and Alan stepped back from him to gingerly pull the zip around the top flap of the battered camera bag.

Alan stared in horror at the long, long oval eggs cushioned inside.  He locked wide eyes on Billy.  “You stole ‘raptor eggs?” he asked, voice a terrible mix of disbelief and anger.

Billy swallowed.  “Listen, Alan, I thought they’d be worth a fortune, enough to fund the dig for years.”  Alan was staring at him, and he knew it was a weak explanation.  “I know I was wrong.  I dropped the bag when we were running from the pack... if I’d have known you’d end up with it... I would never have put you in danger, you know that.”

“You put us all in danger,” Alan snarled.

“I know.  And I’m sorry.”  Billy shook his head.  “I took them on an impulse.  I know it was a stupid decision, but believe me, I did it with the best intentions.”

“Billy… some of the worst things imaginable have been done with the best intentions.”

Dark, brown eyes filled with sorrow.  “It’s not the same….”

Alan’s gaze flashed.  “They surrounded me,” he continued, not wanting to hear Billy’s excuses.  “I couldn’t understand what they wanted, what they were saying to one another.  Now I know what they were looking for.  They’ll hunt us down, you know that?  They won’t give up until they get these eggs back.”  He shook his head.  “I can’t believe you’d do this.”


“Spare me the crap, Billy!”  Alan gathered the strap – that lucky strap – up in his fist and strode to the window.  He was about to drop them out, when he hesitated.  Having the eggs was bad.  It was attracting the ‘raptors.  But not having them when the female found them... that could be a lot worse.  At least at the moment, they had a peace offering of sorts.

Pulling the bag back through the broken window, Alan turned to his lover standing just behind him.  “You... you’re no better than the people who built this place!”

Billy’s heart stopped pounding.  Stopped altogether for a moment, he imagined.  “Alan, please....”

“Don’t....”  Alan lowered his voice.  “Don’t even talk to me, Billy.  Just... don’t.”

Billy thought he felt his heart shatter.  He looked at Alan, his eyes brimming with the pain he felt.  But Alan turned away, swung his pack off his shoulders and tucked the bag into the top of it.

Billy crossed further onto the rusted observation deck, staring through the paneless window, not seeing the misted view beyond.  Running his fingers through his hair, he blinked back his tears and swallowed hard on the lump on his throat.  He wasn’t going to cry.  Not since he’d watched Tom Pritchard get the back of his head torn away just two feet in front of him had he cried.

Alan’s words had had a more brutal effect even than that.

Paul had crossed to him, was talking quietly to him.  And then they descended the metal staircase set in the centre of the deck, Amanda and Eric close behind.

Billy waited.  He knew, with a certainty that was like a sickness in the pit of his stomach, that Alan wouldn’t come back after him as he had done at the ‘raptor nest.

He’d lied.  But worse than that, he’d stolen from the most dangerous and, in a way, precious and guarded source on this island.

In Alan’s eyes, doing anything here but surviving and escaping was tantamount to treachery.  Billy had known that.

Finally he forced himself to follow the others.  As much as he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him, he didn’t want to die here, or worse, get left behind.

He stepped onto the metal platform in time to hear the steps giving way under Alan’s feet.

He crossed quickly to where they were, but Paul was already giving the other man a hand up, asking if he was okay.

That direction was impossible, so Alan had to find them another way down.  As he passed in front of Billy, heading back the way they’d come, he looked at his lover with hard eyes.

Billy’s glance back was one of exquisite pain.

Alan ignored it.

Like he was ignoring the agony searing his heart.

He needed to be angry.  What Billy had stupidly done had put them all at risk, dropped them all into danger.  Worse than being chased simply because they tasted nice, they were being hunted as thieves.

Thoughts of Billy were all he could muster as he walked over the rusted metal bridge into the thick fog.  Clearing the ravine, he called over for the next one to come across.

Mind wandering, he roamed further on, running his hand over the railing, seeing in his mind’s eye the hurt in his lover’s beautiful brown eyes.  He’d caused that.

Miserably, he looked down to see what his hand had brushed into on the metal bar.  Picking up a lump of the dusty substance, he crumbled it in his fingers.

A frown creased his face as he looked up and watched as the fog started to clear above them.

“Oh my God,” he breathed to himself.

Stepping up behind him, Amanda asked.  “What is it?”

Alan swallowed.  “It’s a birdcage.”

“For what?”

Then they heard Eric’s scream.

Like all the terrible moments, it happened too fast for them to think.  They ran, following the Pteranodon’s flight path as best they could along the metal gangways.

Alan headed back to the observation platform, meaning to search for another way around the sheer cliff face.  He stopped in his tracks when he saw Billy.

The young man’s head lifted slowly, his gaze settling on his lover as he snapped closed the parasail fastening around his waist.

He recognised the expression of horror on Alan’s face; the fear in his eyes as the realisation, of what Billy was about, to do struck him.


Turning, Billy started for the circular deck, breaking into a run when he heard Alan’s footsteps on the metal behind him.

“Billy, stop!  Don’t!  No, Billy!”

Billy tried not to hear the plea in his lover’s voice as it became more desperate.  If he stopped, if Alan caught him, he wouldn’t be able to do this.

Leaping up, he balanced on the rusted railing, clicking the final strap into place around the top of his right thigh.

“No!  Billy, don’t!”  Alan’s fingers caught Billy’s ankle as he jumped, but it was too late.  “Billy!  I’m sorry….”

From that moment, until Eric pointed out Billy on the cliffs opposite, everything was a blur.

Alan ran, feet slipping and twisting on the rocks.  He could see Billy struggling with his ‘cute as it caught on a rock protruding from the cliff face.  There were three Pteranodons around him, each swooping toward him, shrieking loudly.

As Alan and Paul neared the river, Billy managed to free himself and dropped into the water, arms flailing.

But it was deep enough, and instead of smashing his bones on the bed of the river, he surfaced and found his feet.  Above him, a Pteranodon circled, spiralling downwards.

“Billy!”  Relieved, Alan started into the water.  “Billy, hang on.”

A second Pteranodon came from nowhere.  It dove straight at Billy, claws piercing his shoulder as its weight forced him forward into the water and its beak held his head under.

Alan screamed, wading through the swirling current toward where the two creatures were shrieking at one another, seemingly fighting for their prey.

There was momentarily relief as Billy surfaced, but the expression on his face spoke only of pain and defeat.

Billy saw Alan and yelled out, “Alan!  Get ba…. aaah!”  One of the Pteranodons had dug its talons into his shoulders and was lifting him out of the water once more.

Alan’s shout got lodged in his throat as one moment Billy was being carried, struggling, and the next he was dropped again.


“Alan, get the fuck away!”

“No!  Billy, hang on….”

Either Billy was too heavy to lift, or his struggles were making it impossible to keep hold of him.

Instead of trying to carry him bodily, the Pteranodons had obviously decided to kill him here and take him bit by bit to their young.

The sharp claws dug deeper, and this time, Billy went under.  Both creatures started at him, lifting him only inches before dropping him, pecking at him, tearing small morsels of flesh from his arms and neck and shoulders.

He didn’t – couldn’t - hear Alan’s screams, his agonised pleas.

Paul was holding the desperate man back, grasping his arm hard, trying to urge him away even as he fought to free himself, to reach his lover.

A third Pteranodon, that had been watching Billy’s slow death, turned its head slowly to gaze calculatingly at the other two men.

“Come on!”  Paul was urging him, pulling him back.  “He’s gone!”

“No!  Billy….”

“I know!”  More gentle, “I know.  I’m sorry….  But we’ll be next if we wait here any longer!”

Alan knew the other man was right.  Billy was gone.  They could no longer see him or the two Pteranodons eating him alive.

Blinking the hot tears from his eyes, Alan allowed Paul to drag him away and they swam for the boat.


Heading slowly downstream, they were safe for now at least.

But to get to this point had cost Alan the most important, most beloved person in his life.

Sitting down in the front of the boat, Alan wrapped his arms around himself and leaned forward, losing the fight with his tears.

He didn’t want to cry.  He didn’t want to feel anything.  He wished he were numb, like he had been the night Ellie had left him.

But this wasn’t Ellie, this was Billy – the love of his life.  And he hadn’t ended their relationship, he’d been torn away by InGen’s monsters.

Glancing up, Alan saw the Kirby family huddled together in the little cabin at the centre of the boat.  They were talking quietly, hugging.

Alan looked away.

Instead of feeling nothing, he was feeling everything.

Grief warred with anger toward the people who’d brought them here, who’d promised them a future and instead had ripped it from them without so much as an apology.

Everyone seemed to have ‘the best intentions’.  He screwed his eyes shut, lowering his head into his filthy hands as the phrase echoed back to him in his own voice – those words spoken so harshly at his beloved Billy.

Why had he said that?  What the hell had he been thinking?  Or was that just the problem?  He hadn’t been thinking at all.

Ian would have kicked his ass all the way across the damn island for saying something that stupid under such stressful, terrifying conditions.

But worse than remembering his own accusations was remembering the pain in Billy’s big brown eyes as his heart had broken.

His shoulders hunched and a deep sob forced its way up from Alan’s chest.  Gasping, he started to cough and the tears broke through, falling in an unstoppable cascade to the deck of the boat.

As he cried, he slowly refocused his anger toward the Kirbys, away from himself.  He hurt too much.  He might have been responsible for Billy taking the absurd risk that he did, but Paul and Amanda Kirby were responsible for them ever being out here in the first place.

Raising his head slowly, he levelled his hard gaze at the couple behind the dirty glass of the cabin.

“Please don’t blame them.”

Eric’s voice broke Alan’s building hatred.  He glanced up at the twelve-year-old as Eric lowered himself onto the seat opposite.


“I know you’re blaming my parents for what happened to Billy.  I know they brought you out here with lies and empty promises they can’t keep.”

Alan snorted, looking away.  “It doesn’t matter about the money….”

“I know.  But Billy’s… dead, and you think it’s their fault.”

“It is their fault.”

“They only wanted to save me.”

“Eric….”  Taking a deep breath, shaking his head, Alan tried to pull himself together.  “Ian Malcolm and I… we rescued Billy from Jurassic Park two years ago.  We knew what we were doing, knew why we were going in.  We had military backup, guns and grenades.  Still we all nearly ended up as dinosaur food, and Billy still wound up in hospital.  We could have come prepared, and I’m not talking about the three jokers your Dad rounded up.”  He gazed at the deck.  “But we didn’t.  And those jokers, and the one person that made my life worth living, are gone.”  Taking a shuddering breath, he pressed his fingers into his eyes.  “Now I’d like to be alone.”

The kid nodded, and slowly getting to his feet he started away from Dr Grant.


Twelve hours after Alan had yelled at Billy, had torn out his heart and stamped on it, he was mentally thanking god for what Billy had been and what he’d done before.

The resonating chamber he’d scoped out, the afternoon Alan had returned home from the lecture tour, had just saved their lives.

And the helicopters they could hear clearly now above them were surely their rescue.  Although god alone – if indeed there was one – knew why or how.

They ran from the clearing through the woodland, the trees and the undergrowth, to come out on the edge of a sandy shore.

The oddest sight met them.

A man, in a suit, standing on the sand, holding a clipboard and a megaphone.  “Dr Grant!”

Paul and Amanda, confused beyond words, ran forward, shouting, waving their hands, telling him it was a very bad idea.

But the man with the megaphone was still shouting, and there was something urgent about his tone.

Eric turned and screamed.

Alan barely felt the ‘raptor’s hooked claw pierce his shoulder as the creature leapt onto his back.  He didn’t really hear his own scream as white-hot, liquid agony soared through his body.

He hit the ground, pushed forward by the momentum and weight of the ‘raptor.  The air was slammed out of him and as he gasped for breath, he choked on the sand that filled his mouth, throat and lungs.

“Everybody down!”

Paul dragged his wife and son to the ground as the sound of high-velocity weapons filled the air.

The marines had landed, and within seconds they’d put enough lead into the ‘raptor to dice it into pieces and spread it around the immediate area.

Alan heard the loud noises through the haze of pain.  He had no idea what had just happened.  All he knew was that finally he was numb.  It was a blessed darkness that called to him, and he let himself slide into its embrace.

Eric stayed close to his mom as the naval paramedics field-dressed the deep wound in Alan’s back and set up breathing apparatus and an IV line to replace the some of the blood he was losing.

“Let’s load him up!” one of the marines called after ten long minutes.  “We have to get him back, stat!  He might have a punctured lung so let’s do this quickly!”

Another couple of marines had already ushered the family toward a different helicopter than the one the medics were heading to with Alan’s unconscious form.  Eric had been reassured that they would all end up on the same naval carrier, and that they’d be able to keep a check on Alan’s condition there.

As they stepped up inside the helicopter, one of the marines peered inside.  “Was there another with you?” he asked, “a young man?”

Eric’s face lit up.  “Yes!  Billy….”  He hesitated as he thought what the question could mean.

Paul came forward.  “Have you found his body?”

“Better than that, we found him alive, inland about a half a mile.  He was fairly out in the open and one of the medics chopper pilots spotted him on our first pass.”

Paul couldn’t help his open smile.  “Is he… okay?”

“He’s gonna be fine.  He’s lost a lot of blood, but he’ll pull through.”  He tossed them a smile and a salute and backed out of the helicopter, leaving it to take off.

In the second helicopter, they fastened Alan’s stretcher into place before settling themselves in for the five-minute trip over to the carriers awaiting their return.

Alan swam just out of reach of consciousness.

Only once did he surface.

He opened his eyes and through his blurred vision he saw Billy lying on the other cot, just a couple of feet away.  Despite the numbness and cold that had spread through Alan’s whole body, he felt a terrible grief strike his heart over again.

They’d found Billy’s body.

He hadn’t the strength to cry.  He just lay there for a time, looking at the corpse of the man who’d been his lover for two years, a man he treasured more than his own life.

“Peaceful….”  Alan murmured, the word sounding nothing much more than a gurgle into the oxygen mask covering his face.  Reaching out painfully, Alan trailed his fingertips over Billy’s eyelids and nose.  “Love you…” he whispered.

Then he brought his hand back to his side and squeezed his eyes shut against the world that had become too painful to bear.

He didn’t care much if he never woke up.

* * *

Two Days Later – Queen Of Angels Hospital, L.A.

Ian sipped at the hot, black liquid that claimed to be coffee.  At least, that was what the button on the front of the machine had called it.


He looked up and smiled, relieved.  “Ellie….”  Putting the plastic cup down on the low table, he returned her hug, tucking her under his chin.  It was good to hold her – good not to be on his own with all the worry.

“How are they?” she asked as she pulled back only slightly.

“Alan’s… still unresponsive.  He’s in a coma.  Billy didn’t do too good on the trip in.  They had to take him into the OR almost immediately and repair some… internal stitching.”  He shook his head.  He wasn’t great with medical details.

She mirrored the helpless expression on his face.  “Can we see them?”

“We can see Alan.  Billy’s not out of recovery yet.”

Ellie took Alan’s hand, wrapping her fingers around his.  Ian looked around at the monitors keeping a check on the patient’s progress.  Everything looked and sounded… normal.

“We don’t know why he isn’t coming out of it,” the ICU nurse told them truthfully.  “There’s no medical reason.  Sometimes the body just… gives up.  He may come round any minute, he may decide never to come round at all.”

Ellie blinked the tears back from her eyes.  “Why wouldn’t he want to live?”

Crouching down beside her, Ian shrugged.  “I don’t know.  That island… it’s hellish, but Alan’s been through it twice before.”

“Try talking to him,” the nurse suggested.  “Sometimes all it takes is a familiar voice.”

Ellie spent the night sitting at his bedside, telling Alan everything from Charlie’s baby stories to the problems she’d had writing her book.

Ian went to sit with Billy.  He’d been kept drugged up since they’d operated in the naval vessel.  The pain he’d have been in if they’d allowed him to regain consciousness would have been too much for his system to cope with; he had broken bones and internal injuries on top of the visible wounds.

About an hour after they’d moved him out of recovery, Billy opened his eyes.

He looked exhausted.  Ian covered his cold, right hand with his own, minding the IV line.  His left hand was half in plaster because of his broken wrist.  Most of the rest of him was stitched and bandaged.

“Billy….”  Ian spoke his name quietly, not wanting to startle him.  Usually he came over as a vibrant, confident young man.  Lying there surrounded by white, he looked about fifteen and terribly lost.

“Ian….”  He smiled weakly, his voice sounding rough.  “What are you…?”

Ian pre-emptied the question.  “You’re in a hospital in L.A.”


“He’s here too.”  Ian didn’t want to say too much.  “He’s okay.”

Billy frowned, pain dulling his usually dancing eyes.  “If he was… okay… he’d be here.”

Ian couldn’t fault the man’s logic.  “He’s in Intensive Care… in a coma.  They say he’s medically fine, he just won’t wake up.”

Billy tried to sit up, but Ian gently put his hand against Billy’s shoulder – somehow managing to find a patch that wasn’t covered by a sterile dressing.

“You’re not going anywhere,” he told Billy firmly.

“I have to!”  But the sharp pain that seemed to come from everywhere dropped him back to the mattress as surely as Ian’s halting hand.  “Ian… please.  He could… I need to see him.”

“Billy, he isn’t going to die.”  Sitting up on the edge of Billy’s bed, Ian picked up his hand and cushioned it.  Had Alan been here, there would have been a definite difference in the way Billy’s hand was being held.  But Ian could only be reassuring.  “He was attacked by a ‘raptor just as they reached the shore.  It tore into his back, and into his lung.”

Billy’s face crumpled.

“Like I said, he’s okay, Billy.  They’ve fixed everything.  He’s going to make a full recovery.”

“But you said….”

“They don’t know why he’s in the coma.  It’s like… he doesn’t want to wake up.”

Billy closed his eyes.  He wanted to be with Alan.  But his body wasn’t going to respond right now.  It wanted to sleep.

Ian watched Billy struggle with stressed-out system.  “I promise you, if there’s any change at all, I’ll wake you.  I won’t let him die, Billy.  He’s a stubborn bastard, he’s not going to give up that easily.”

Reluctantly, Billy nodded.  He held Ian’s hand tightly, like a lifeline.  One Ian was only too happy to be.


Billy had a dream.  He dreamt of running through a forest, trampling dinosaurs – little Compys – underfoot.

He awoke with a start.  And for some reason, he suddenly remembered being aboard the helicopter that had taken him off Isla Sorna.  He’d lain there for what might have been hours or might have been a few minutes.  They’d dressed his wounds and given him an injection that had quickly taken away all the pain and made him feel like he was floating.

And then there’d been some sort of commotion.  He’d felt fingers touching his face and hearing what had sounded like ‘love you’.  It had taken time for him to open his eyes.  And when he’d eventually managed to, he’d seen Alan lying across from him, on his side, oxygen mask over his face, shirt torn, a bloody bandage wrapped around his chest and back.

He’d watched him, reassuring himself that his lover was still breathing.  He’d been sure that it was Alan who’d touched his face.  And then… Alan had turned away from him.  Again.

He opened his eyes.  Ian was asleep in the chair next to his bed, snoring softly.

Pushing himself up until he was sitting seemed to take all of Billy’s strength.  But he had to see Alan.

Taking a deep breath to steady his spinning head, he swung his legs off the bed.  His whole body screamed in pain but he ignored it.  With some difficulty, he pulled the two IV lines from the valves in the back of his hand.  The blood splattered over the white sheets, the saline dripped onto the tiled floor.

After a couple more deep breaths, Billy slipped off the bed and dropped to his feet.  Immediately, he lost his balance and had to steady himself, leaning his palm and cast down on the mattress.

He breathed hard, the pain shooting through him from his chest, his wrist… just about everywhere.  He had to wait for a minute and let the worst of it pass before he tried to stand.

Finally he managed to shuffle across the room to the door, casting a glance at Ian who remained asleep.

Billy knew that Ian had travelled through the previous night to get to L.A., then spent the day awake and worrying.  He’d have slept through a small earthquake.

Billy got out into the corridor and looked one way then the other.  There was a red sign at the end of the corridor, that he was almost certain read, “Intensive Care Unit”.  He headed for it.

As he walked, he became aware of a draft on his back and his ass.  Stopping for a moment, he groaned inwardly.  Damn hospital gowns.

It would give the nurses something to laugh at anyway.

Following the signs, Billy shuffled undisturbed to the ICU.  It was late at night, he surmised, because there was no one around.  Either that, or he was still dreaming.

Ellie looked up when the door opened, her eyes widening.  “Billy!  You should be….”  She stopped talking and stood up, putting her arm around his waist.  “Come on, sit down.”  He leaned on her as she led him to the chair she’d been sitting in most of the evening and night.  “Do you want me to find a doctor?”

He shook his head, eyes settling on Alan’s still form.

Ellie watched him.  “You should be in bed, Billy, resting.  This isn’t going to do you any good.”

Billy looked up at her through large eyes.  “He thinks I’m dead,” he whispered.  “I remembered… in the helicopter he touched me, and he told me he loved me.  Then… I think he turned away.  I… felt him and heard him, but it was difficult to move, they’d drugged me up to the gills.”

Ellie reached out to brush back the mess of hair at his temple.  He wasn’t going to be comfortable in the chair for very long.  “I’ll get you a robe,” she told him softly.  “Talk to him for a few minutes.”

Billy smiled his thanks, and watched her as she vanished into the corridor.  Waiting a minute for his breathing to becoming easier, he leaned forward, picking up Alan’s hand from the bed and holding it as best he could.

“Alan… you have to wake up now.”  He listened to his own voice, hearing how different it sounded, how raw.  “I know you thought I was dead when you saw me in the helicopter.  But I’d dragged myself half way out of the river and they dragged me the other half….  I’m fine, Alan.  I’m sorry about what I did… the eggs….”  He trailed off.  “You have to come round, Alan.  For me.  Because I need to say I’m sorry and know you believe me.  And because I don’t know how long I can sit here for….”

Ellie pushed the door open.

She’d been gone only about ten minutes and could hardly believe what she saw.

Billy was half-sitting, half-lying in the cushioned chair.  His head was turned to one side, dropped against the high back.  His eyes were closed and his breathing even.

Alan’s hand was outstretched, fingers playing weakly over Billy’s hair.

“Alan….”  Ellie crossed to the bed, sitting on the edge, meeting Alan’s blue eyes when he looked up and smiled at her.  Behind them, two nurses and a doctor were rushing in, alerted by the changed readings on their monitors.

“He’s alive,” Alan whispered to her, smiling brightly.

“He’s fine, Alan,” Ellie reassured him through her tears.  “And so are you.”

“I thought I’d lost him….”

They were interrupted then, and Ellie stepped back, moving to wrap the robe she’d found, as best she could, around Billy’s shoulders.  Despite the noise and fuss, he stayed asleep, exhausted by his short excursion.

Alan hated being prodded and poked.  He made the worst patient imaginable.  But it was thirty minutes before the doctor finally pulled the sheet back up over him and switched off the majority of the monitoring equipment next to the bed.

“You’re going to make a full recovery, Dr Grant,” he told him certainly.  “Which is more than I can say for this young man if he doesn’t start to behave himself.”  His gaze settled firmly on Billy.

“Leave him,” Alan murmured, a soft plea.  “I’ll send him back to his room in the morning, but just… leave him for tonight.  If he wakes up anywhere else, he’ll only come back here.”  He closed his eyes, drifting for a while, hearing Ellie’s voice somewhere in the distance.

“He’s right, Billy needs to see that Alan’s awake and okay.”

The doctor sighed, shaking his head.  “So what are they?  Brothers?”

Ellie chuckled.  “Billy’s Alan’s… boyfriend.”  She shrugged, looking almost apologetic.

“Ah, right.  That explains it.”  He turned to look at the nurse who was hovering, grinning to herself.  “See if you can find a gurney or even a spare bed?  Bring it in here.”

Ten minutes later, they’d moved Billy onto a bed that they’d squeezed into the end of the room.  There wasn’t too much space, but enough for them to get around Alan if need be.

Things had finally quietened down when the door burst open.

“Ellie!”  Ian hissed, “I’ve lost Billy!  He’s….”  He stopped.  “He’s here.”

Ellie took Ian out into the corridor.  “He came to talk to Alan.  Whatever he said, it worked.  Alan woke up.  He’s just sleeping now, they both are.”

Ian rubbed his face with his hands.  “Oh, Christ, Ellie….”

“I know.”  She slid her arm over his shoulders, and slowly they came together in a tight hug.

“Those people….”  Ian shook his head against hers.  “They almost cost us them both.”

“I know that too.  I guess they were desperate.  You rushed off to Nublar to rescue Billy and Hammond’s relatives, then off again to Sorna to rescue Sarah.”

Ian smirked.  “Alan rushed off to Nublar to rescue Billy.”

Ellie laughed softly.  “And you followed.”

“Only because he wasn’t thinking… with his brain or his heart.”  He smiled to himself.  He couldn’t remember ever keeping his promise to himself to slap Alan for dragging them out there on a whim of his libido.

They started down the corridor, heading toward one of the coffee machines.

“Why did you leave him, Ellie?”

She sighed.  She’d been waiting for him to ask that for a long time.

“After Jurassic Park… I started to… loathe what we were doing.  I couldn’t bear to work on the dig any longer.  I told him, one night, that I thought we should leave them buried forever.  You can imagine how well that went down!”

Ian nodded, tapping in the numbers on the coffee machine keypad.

“After that, we grew apart.  I knew he still loved me but I couldn’t come second to his bones any longer.”

“You think you came second?”

“I know I did, Ian.  And now, I know I was right to leave him because, somehow, I don’t think there is anything more important to Alan than Billy.”


“You are driving the poor doctor crazy,” Alan teased.  Billy kissed him again.

Alan had woken to find Billy back in the chair at his bedside, head pillowed on the edge of the mattress, sleeping soundly.

Turning on to his side slightly, painfully, Alan had put his hand onto Billy’s head, combing his fingers through the soft curls.  And Billy had woken.

Now, Billy’s lips were pressed against Alan’s, tongue sliding into his mouth, rubbing over the other’s.

Alan moaned gently, bringing his other arm around to stroke Billy’s shoulders lightly, feeling the dressings under the light material of his robe and gown.

“I’m so sorry,” Billy murmured when they parted.  “What I did….”

Alan lifted his fingers, pressed them over Billy’s lips.  “Ssh.  Don’t.  I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t have said what I did, shouldn’t have done that to you.  I love you, so much.”

“Alan….”  Billy touched his lips to Alan’s once more, tenderly.  “I love you too.  I never, ever wanted to disappoint you.”

“You didn’t….  Oh god, I’m sorry… I made you think….”  Alan brushed his fingertips over Billy’s jawline, his lips and cheek.  He looked into the dark eyes he’d spent hours drowning in, seeing there what he’d always seen – affection, admiration, almost worship.  He’d thrived on that, hung on to it like a lifeline.  And without a thought, he’d almost destroyed it.  “Forgive me?”

Billy kissed Alan’s fingertips, sucking gently on one.  “There’s nothing to forgive.  I think we’re equal.”  He smiled around the digit between his lips.  “When we get home, I want to make long, slow love to you, feel you buried inside me.”

Alan moaned softly.  His body was definitely interested in that, despite its current situation.  “Oh yeah, Billy.”  He licked his lips unconsciously.  “We’ll just spend the day in bed, kissing, touching, taking one another.”

Slowly, he drew Billy toward him.  He stroked his tongue over his lover’s lips, before slipping inside, joining them in a deep kiss.

“Hey!”  They broke apart like a pair of guilty school kids.  Alan’s doctor was standing in the doorway, arms crossed.  “Neither of you are well enough to even be thinking about that kind of thing, never mind doing it!  And you!”  He stared at Billy pointedly.  “You should be in bed!  You have several internal injuries which you’ll be aggravating at best, reopening at worst!”

Billy placed another long kiss on Alan’s lips.  “I think that’s a hint,” he murmured.

Alan frowned.  “You didn’t say you were injured.”

“I’m fine.”

“Umm.  Bed.  Now.”

A smile curled Billy’s lips.  “I remember the last time you said that to me….”


Ian pushed open the door of Billy’s hospital room, jangling his keys loudly.  “Taxi’s here! .… Oh, Jeez, get a room!”

Alan was sitting behind Billy on his bed, with his lover sitting cross-legged between his knees.  He nipped the back of Billy’s neck with his teeth, gently teasing the top of his spine.  “I was under the impression we were in one.”

Ian rolled his eyes.  “Have they cut you loose yet?”

“No, we’re waiting….”

Ian moved out of the way as the doctor, who’d looked after Alan and Billy over the last few days, put a hand on his arm.  “You’re here to take them to the airport?” he asked.  Ian nodded.  “Thank god for that!”

Alan tightened his arms around Billy’s waist.  In the doctor’s eyes, they might have been an awkward pair.  But after all they’d been through they just needed to be close to one another.

Alan loved to touch Billy, to hold him.  He’d believed this lost to him, and to have it back seemed like a miracle.

Billy was just basking in the attention.

“Get out of here, the both of you,” their doctor told them.  “And for godsake, try to take care of yourselves.”

* * *

Alan and Billy dropped from jeep and looked around.  The dig was still in full operation.  It didn’t look like anything had changed.  Gary, who’d been left in charge, met them halfway up the incline.

“Dr Grant!  Billy!  Jeez!”  He shook their hands, noting the cast on Billy’s wrist.  “We’ve missed you guys.”

They followed him down, Gary glancing behind every couple of seconds, smiling when he saw Alan giving Billy a steadying hand as they descended.

They had been sorely missed.

For two years, Alan and Billy had brought a brightness and joy to the dig that made it the best palaeontology excavation any of them had ever worked on.

When the news had got out about where they’d gone, what had happened, everyone had been upset and worried.

To see them both alive and in one piece – for the most part – was a relief.

Billy went out to see what progress – if any – had been made on the excavation itself.  Alan checked through the mail that had piled up.

One envelope was addressed to ‘Dr Alan Grant & Mr Billy Brennan’.  He opened it, and as he pulled out a folded sheet of expensive writing paper, another, rectangular sheet fluttered to the ground, coming to rest under the table.

Alan glanced at it, couldn’t read the typed writing from where he was standing, and ignored it for now.  He unfolded the letter.

‘My dear Dr Grant, my adventurous Mr Brennan,

Firstly, let me express my sorrow at the loss of more lives to the creatures on Sorna.  That you both were tricked onto the island saddens me, that you saved the life of a young boy and his parents is testament to the amazing people that you are.

Not being able to work out what on this earth would persuade you, Alan, to return to the islands (knowing you still have your prize from the last trip…) I contacted the Montana State University and found out about the financial situation of your dig.  I hope you don’t mind.

Believe it or not, Paul Kirby shouting his mouth off about his experiences and the lack of help afforded to he and his wife actually pushed the InGen share price through the roof.  I sold all my shares and made a fortune.

And so, I enclose a cheque.  It should help somewhat with your continuing research.  After all, I have to make sure Billy has a full time job, I don’t want him ever to feel that returning to Jurassic Park is a viable option.

Take care, both of you.  And I hope to meet with you sometime soon.  Alan, Tim and Lex would love to see you again and I know they would love to meet Billy.

Your friend,
John Hammond’

“Who’s that from?” Billy asked as he stepped up behind Alan, putting one hand on his lover’s hip and bending down to retrieve the fallen piece of paper from under the table.

His eyes widened as he stared at the cheque.

“It’s from John Hammond,” Alan told him, looking across at what Billy was holding.  He’d written them a cheque for three-quarters of a million dollars.  “Fuck me.”

Billy grinned at him.  “That would be one way of celebrating.”



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